Okay, y'all. I want a "rewind" button. I want to rewind the clock back to January 1...or at least, the end of January, and start this year all over again.
I want to rewind the devastating news I got on January 30, the prayer request from the friend who rarely asks me for prayers; I don't want to find out that Brendan's cancer is back. He was supposed to be in remission! He was more than half-way to the five-year mark! I was counting the months down! It's not fair!!!
I want to rewind Lent, and actually read Job this year. Except...would I have read Job if Brendan hadn't gotten sick again? Probably not. So let's skip Job, thank you very much.
I want to rewind the horrible tragedy that happened to a friend's family only a month ago.
I want to rewind the death of Brendan's grandfather....as if the man doesn't already have enough to deal with.
I was going to take a break this week from social media, to try to wrap my head around all of this; and then the work week was sooo crazy, it gave me no time to breathe, much less sit and pause and wrap my head around all of this.
I have taken a break from Facebook; but I blog so infrequently these days, I figure this wouldn't hurt my attempts to clear my head. In fact, seeing as I think best when I get my thoughts out of my head and "onto paper" (in this case, "onto the screen" of whatever device you are using to read this), I thought it might help. That's why I started blogging 4 years ago, anyway.
So, yeah...I want a do-over button. I want to start 2015 over again.
Unfortunately, I can't start the year over again. There is no "rewind" button.
All I can do is keep going forward.
And one of the ways that's keeping me going forward is this: I am learning, slowly, step by step, and fighting it all the way, that prayer is not simply "the only" thing I can do for all of my friends; prayer is the most important thing I can do for all of my friends who are suffering in one way or another this year.
So I guess I just have to keep plodding forward, and praying, and plodding, and praying, and falling down and getting stuck, and praying some more.
Because the God I'm praying to...is all-powerful. He's all-knowing. He's all-loving. He's all-merciful. And the best thing I can do to help my friends, and myself, is to ask Him for help.
Oremus semper pro invicem! (Let us always pray for each other!)