My thoughts and reflections on my Catholic Faith, Fulton Sheen, the problem of suffering, and books

Saturday, October 3, 2015

Some Thoughts in my Head

I don't talk much about the personal life of the Theological-Librarian on this blog, even though when I started it four years ago, it was a place to vent my very personal thoughts and feelings about something that was going on then.

I know I've been quiet on here lately, no deeply theological posts, no book reviews, no Sheen quotes. I never even wrote a post about the visit of the Pope, even though some comments I saw on Facebook upset me immensely. There's a lot going on, almost too much for me to sit down and even journal about. And when the person who processes her life by writing can't write about it in her journal...that's problematic.

But I think I'm going to try to write a personal blog post, and see if that gets some of all of this out of my head.

Fall is officially here, and that means that the rainy, cold, dreary weather of fall is also here. I hate rain. Even though I can drive now, I still hate it. (I hated it more when I had to bike everywhere, or get rides from people. Biking just meant I got wet, wet, wet; and as for getting rides from people...I have trust issues, and independence issues [which is why being able to drive is so good for me], wasn't good.)

I braved the rain on Thursday to drive to Front Royal to visit campus. 66 wasn't that bad, although of course it had to start raining harder the second I got on the highway. I was able to catch up with a very dear friend; we talked about everything and nothing, and it was a nice, relaxed visit. It was good. Even if emotions and bad weather have gotten me grumpy now, I'm reminding myself that Thursday was a good day, and thanking God for that.

As I wrote a few months ago, I've hit burnout on my job as a caregiver. So my last morning shift there was Sep. 30, and I'll only be working there in the evenings, for 8 hours a week. That means a lot more time in the week to job-hunt. (One of my favorite activities....not!) It also means time for daily Mass (I need to get back to that I don't have to be at work at 9 am, maybe I can drag my lazy self to 8:30. Before, 8:30 am Mass was pushing it for getting to work on time, and as for Mass at 7 a.m....I am sooo not a morning person), theoretically more prayer time, and some much-needed time to de-stress and decompress from everything this year has brought.

Not that it's been a bad year for me personally; it's just been a bad year for 90% of my friends, and I haven't handled any of that well. The ironing board at my caregiving job has seen a lot of tears this year, which is one of the reasons I need to leave it behind.

It's been a while since I've done a Gratitude List, so here's today's:

Grateful For:
#43. A roof over my head to keep me warm and dry.

#44. Socks on my feet to keep my toes warm.
#45. and perfect for today's weather.
#46. A bed to curl up in and take a nap.
#47. Tea in my mug.
#48. Good health.
#49. Friends who understand why I'm quitting my job, even if it's not the most "prudent" thing to do.
#50. The kids and volunteers of SPRED.
#51. The ability to pray for all of my friends who need prayers.

And on that note....

Praying for:

+ A friend who's recovering from chemo and fighting an upper respiratory infection.
+ My roommate, who has a cold and still has to teach school.
+ The daughter of a friend's coworker...St. Peregrine, pray for her!

God Love Y'All!

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